The summer after graduation I had a huge party out at my dad’s place in the country. I swear half of the town was there. During our partying and drinking there comes a knock on the door. I answer it and there’s this guy I’ve never seen before standing there. He asked me if I was having a party. He was kind of cute so I say “Yea, why don’t you come on in and have a beer?” Cutie replies, “Okay, give me minute though I have to call my friends.”

All of a sudden we have at least 10 cop cars swarming all over the yard! NO JOKE. We had city, county, excise, not to mention the fucking plain clothed detective who I invited in for a beer. They were chasing people through the fields, found them hiding in the barn, crossing the creek, it was a mad house.

Those of us that were caught got herded inside were we started taking breathalyzers. My one friend, who was drunk as a skunk, ran into the bedroom where another friend had their 5 year old sleeping. She jumped in bed with the kid just as a cop opened the door. She pretended he had woke her up and asked what was going on she was just watching the kid.  The cop said okay and let her go! Another friend lied about his damn name and got caught in the lie so he was taken to jail. One friend gave his cousin’s name (who was also at the party) the cop asked what my friend had blown on the breathalyzer test and he gave his cousin’s number. His ass got away scott free.

My favorite guy of the night was a kid who asked if he could go pee so the cops let him (this was before they even got his name or had him blow). He goes into the bathroom. About a half hour later the cops realize he never came back. The bathroom door was locked so the go around back. The kid had locked the door, crawled out the window and had gotten away HAHAHAHAHA.

The cops made me dump out the alcohol, including a bottle of wine my dad had. Of course I asked the officers if they would like a drink before it went down the drain. Give me a break, I was feeling pretty damn good. Cops couldn’t kill my buzz. The kids under 18 were made to call their parents to come get them. Those over 18 were “arrested” and not too drunk to drive were able to leave but had a court date to go to. I don’t think our small county Jail could hold all of us. After they left there were a whole bunch of us still sitting there. We had found some liquor hidden behind the couch and figured fuck it the cops weren’t coming back. So we drank that shit. HAHAHAH

That next week it was all over the front page of the paper “THE DYER PARTY”. Damn I must have made my dad proud. When we went to court we were given probation, counter measures, all that fun stuff, and told if we didn’t get into trouble in the next year it would be dropped from our records. So when our sentences were given once again in the paper “THE DYER PARTY”. Only about half of our group made in the next year without trouble. It took me two tried to make it through counter measures. The first time I kept falling asleep, I had been up partying all night the night before and Judge Heimann was just so damn boring. I actually got kicked out of counter measures for sleeping. The second time I had to keep punching and pinching my leg to stay awake.

When a year had passed we marched back to the court house for the follow up with the judge. We noticed there was a deputy in the back of the room. I was joking with everyone “Gee I wonder who he’s here for HAHA”. Ya guess what, the joke was on me. Before the proceedings even really began the prosecutor filed some additional (and unrelated) charges against me and my butt was hauled from the court house off to county. Why you ask? Well that’s a story for another day HAHAHAH Ah to be young again.

I can laugh about it now because it was minor stuff over 20 years ago and has never kept me from a job I wanted. But I’m telling you, that must have been one hell of a party. There’s still times (just last year) I’ll run into people and they’ll mention they were busted at my party and for the life of me I don’t know who the hell they are!